Thursday, May 10, 2001 02:54 p.m.
Ah! I forgot to mention that the text I pasted in the wallpaper were tiny excerpts from this poem I wrote a while ago:

Please don't say a word,
don't say a word.
I only want to tell you my thoughts.
Please be silent,
I can see the words ready to leave your lips.
I only beg your attention this short time.

When I bend my head down,
my hair curtaining my face.
It is because your words have stabbed me a sudden short pain.
When I shrink away from your touch,
your fingers are coarse and rough,
devoid of the touch of love.
When I turn my face away,
when you cry what a disappointment I--this has been,
I am hurt beyond the pain
you understand.

I am not asking for more,
not asking for understanding,
nor the fake approval I see you begin to think will suffice
to keep me.
You cannot curtain your anger,
and cannot dull the sharp of your knives,
I know all this.
Just as I cannot stop feeling,
cannot stop breathing,
cannot stop loving you.

That was it,
my thoughts.
I'm not asking for more you see;
I only wanted you to know.

^^; It got really sucky towards the end, huh? Aaanyway, I also wanted to say that Tin-neesan, I've finally finally gotten Imadoki! *lmao* Yep, the genki girl (her name's Tanpopo...TANPOPO!! *roflmao*), silent brooding dude and a whole load of flower power. ^^; It's actually pretty fun, suprisingly.
Usually Watase Yuu's manga have so many elements of magic/fantasy in them and that (plus her fantastic plot/character development) is what attracts me to them. ;D

Thursday, May 10, 2001 02:29 p.m.
^___^v Shizukesa's been updated. No site additions except READ which is finally open! (if you haven't already heard from Alexa's blog already... ^^v)*beams* Please go visit.
For the benefit of those who haven't any idea what READ is, it's actually a Hanazakari no Kimi Tachi E series site, which I share with Alexa. It houses almost everything Hanakimi-related, so if you have a thing for cute shoujo romances and have heard of it (or am insanely in love with it as well, for that matter) please do visit. *beams* I am so good at plugging sites. XD
Mm, last night I was twiddling around with that gorgeous violety blue image of Kamui from ASUKA (which I got at With a Slash btw) and came up with this. It's in 800x600 only, sorry, and the blue is more than a little obnoxious but hey--gimme credit for making a wallpaper again after months of *koff* wallpaper-related inactivity:

Wednesday, May 9, 2001 05:02 p.m.
I learnt a little while ago that my old neighbour (from when I was still living on landed property) had just been executed by hanging for trafficking drugs.
Needless to say I was shocked and upset (though probably not as much as I would have been if I had kept in touch with him even now, but I haven't--and I was pretty young back then when he still was my neighbour).
I don't remember all that much of him now, though I do remember his dogs. He had four dogs in all--and occasionally one or two would arrive and stay for a couple of days. Mm...there was Zeebu, the old and flea-infested German Shepherd, Ruby, the gorgeous and silky Siberian Husky, Boy, the other furry and hyperactive Syberian Husky, and another one (did he even have a name?!) which was a large white German Shepherd, which I was told was trained to kill. O_O! He was kept locked in a large cage, and only let out when his trainer came to take him for walks. (probably the only time the entire neighbourhood just shut its doors, and all was quiet. :D)
Of course, he was a real nice man himself. He used to give me little treats, and teach me things, like how to feed the chickens and stuff. :D I also remember his lovely girlfriend, who promised me a little something if I scored well on my Chinese test. *NIKO*
I never did manage to get back to her on that... >.>; Yeah well, those are all/most of the nice memories of my ex-neighbour (who will remain unnamed here) I harbour, and I will always hold them close as a part of my childhood days, sappy as that may sound. *smiles*

Monday, May 7, 2001 11:40 a.m.
Mm, today's a happy public holiday in Singapore...though the name of it has slipped my mind right now... ^^;;; *hits self* Ahh, I know this is awfully late, but I want to send my appreciation out to all those who wished me good luck for the exams. Although I didn't reply, (I meant to!! ^^;) I want to say I read it and am much much much obliged. *hugs to everyone* (for this has made Charlene the representative of goodwill, or some such thing)
Ah, Flipper, I can totally understand your Gals! craze! It is such an addictive manga!! *_* Although I've only read a couple of volumes, I've just completely fallen in love with it... *sighs* Ran's gorilla boyfriend is so cute! *lol*
Here's to all the people who responded to my Tokyo post, NYAH. LMAO!! *sticks tongue out and runs off* Nah, kidding kidding. I'll try to bring back some stuff I can share though, as in artbooks and scans... :D And Jessica, I've never been much of an online shopper so I wouldn't know about shipping/handling costs but I imagine them to be--well, not cheap? ^^; *is trying not to gloat*
Oh man...Selenity, you burst my bubble bad. ;_; *LMAO* But it sounds great!! Which specific places are you going??! I want very much to go to Kyoto but I'm afraid there will be little chance of that happening.
And Reins, what is wrong with you?! Why can't you make normal layouts which don't compel every remotely fangirlish person to start drooling over their keyboard... ><; Hmph.

Thursday, May 3, 2001 06:37 p.m.
Yes, blogging again, when I shouldn't be. >_>;
Ay, the art here in the layout is pretty...reminds me of Angel Sanctuary and that's not bad at all... *_* *hudges Joey and Toshi*
Hmm...three relatively unimportant (but still prep-worthy) exams tomorrow...English and Chinese Compo-writing and my first Bio paper. =/ That's the beginning of about a week straight of exams. >_O;;
Ahaha~~! I didn't want to mention this til it was confirmed and now it is, I shall tell. *biiig grin* Guess who's going to Tokyo this Juuune?? *whistles* I'm going to Ueno Park (whether it be sakura season or not, it'll still be pretty... *dark glance at Alexa*) and Shibuya and a couple of the large buildings that are so oft mentioned (and destroyed/abused) in X. *____*
Argh, and now Bio. *twitch*

Wednesday, May 2, 2001 03:45 p.m.
Heh, am downloading a Bjork song titled "Charlene" ... o.O; I wonder what it's about...? ^^
I finally took one of those test/game/quiz thingys everyone's blogging about: THE NAME GAME *cue eerie violin*

Charlene knows nothing about anything.
Charlene has a thing for gay men.
Charlene eats roadkill.
Charlene shouldn't get riled up...
Charlene is sexually aroused by relatives.
Charlene doesn't wash their hands.
Charlene shouldn't be left alone with animals.
Charlene will do anything for sex.

Hmm... =/ Oh yes and Joey! That is a helluva lot worse than what I sounds horrible... o_O;; I would be really scared if I were you too...
A while back, while me and my mom were checking our mailbox, this man just stood behind us and watched silently. He didn't bother to disguise his attention and it really freaked me out.
After that I kinda made sure all doors and windows were closed (except the kitchen one, which no one would bother peeking in anyway, since you'd have to climb up 4 stories to do so XD) and I got freaked and actually jumped when I heard someone outside our door and no one unlocking the door...
Ahhh, I am easily freaked by these things...

Sunday, April 29, 2001 03:01 p.m.
Whoo, last night something really extraordinary happened. I was in my room reading manga (^^;;;) when I heard a loud male yell and a crash. Not a car crash, kinda like stuff falling over or something. I didn't take it seriously and thought it was probably some drunkard or something.
Then I heard my dad speaking on the phone with a really serious tone, and I knew something was wrong. I came out and asked him what was going on, and he said he'd just seen four men chasing after one guy right in front of our flat. I wasn't wearing my contacts and couldn't make shit out of anything when we leaned over to see, but I saw that some tiles of the shelter of the bus stop right in front of us had fallen off and there were holes in the friggin thing.
My dad said he saw one of the men with a broom *twitch* which he tossed aside, and the entire bus stop was a mess. The bin was tipped over and everything... o_o;
I went to bed after that and this morning, I woke up and asked my dad what happened again. He said the police arrived really late and what actually happened was that four men cornered one on the fifth floor, and he jumped off, damaging the roof of the bus stop. o_O; There are two police cars in our carpark right now... =/
It doesn't strike one as much when you read it in the papers, but when it does happen so close home... o_o;; Ah well. Hrm, I have to go tackle Physics and Chem now...ja!

Thursday, April 26, 2001 05:51 p.m.
Hmm, Spinel is going on a very short little hiatus of about say--2 to three weeks. ^^; Due to my mid-years looming right up ahead next week (plus me not having opened a single textbook as yet T_T), I'll not be able to blog all that much anymore and even if I did, my entries probably wouldn't be full of anything other than exams and homework and boring stuff. (Not that they already aren't... O_<;)
Ah hem. Yeah, so. I'll try to blog a little in between, but basically there will be few new sorry about that. =/
Meantime, fill up Onnatachi for me ne, Anna? And I'll be sure to return the favour when your turn comes... =_=;;
So ja ne! See you in a couple of days/weeks na? ^.~

Wednesday, April 25, 2001 04:50 p.m.
:D I got a new mouse todaaaay~~~~~!! ^^v Finally~~! My old one (or rather, the one I just got about two months ago) was dying on me, it was horrible for editing layouts. >_<;; Especially when I wanted to draw a simple circle without the tool, the thing kept giving me problems. >_<;
The new one is smoooooth!!! ^o^ I've forgotten what it was like to have a mouse which glides across the monitor like that..... *sighs contentedly* Heck, I've forgotten what it was like to even have a mouse which doesn't piss me off by clicking links left and right when all I'm aiming for is something else! *blinks*
Hehe, I was at the CD shop today with Angie and she wanted to show me what Shinhwa was like, to spread her obssesiveness. o_O; Well, this group of girls who saw us browsing through a couple of Shinhwa albums, came over to talk with us.
They were so~~ funny!! If scary screaming fangirls were real in real life (well, they are but that's not the point ><;) it would be them. XD;; They jumped and screamed, and cried, "SUGOI NE!!!!!!" (yeah, they know Japanese too...figures huh? XD) and basically made a whole scene at the shop.
They even tried to teach us a couple of Shinhwa's dancesteps and sang along loudly to the mtvs we were watching. *_* I was having such a good time! Wondering why we didn't get thrown out of the shop? Hehe. The owner (?) herself came over to reproach them--not for screaming, but for promoting Shinhwa instead of H.O.T.!! XD XD;;; My, I am so going back to that shop again.
And they've got me hooked on Shinhwa now!! *siiighs* I am too weak. ><; Take a look at this here and tell me Shinhwa ain't worth my crazy fangirl gushing Ahhh.......... *_* Oh and TIN! I shall never forgive you for leaving so suddenly after I finally managed to catch you on AIM again after god knows how long. ;_; And here's your AIM buddy icon to prove it:

Hehe. ^o^ Don't disappear again too long!! *sweet X-files-tape-destructive smile*

Tuesday, April 24, 2001 09:43 p.m.
Whoo...Singapore's ranked as the World's 2nd most competitive country, after the US? *____* There you go, all those ignorant imbeciles who keep bothering me about how I learnt to speak English so good. HAH! XP Nah, kidding, kidding. *backs off at advance of muttering shadows*
I like the new layout, Reins! But the font colour has me squinting at the monitor... ^^;; Or it might be just my computer...since my browser has been known to give me cached junk just like Joey's (haha, us and our jurassic aged compies... =_=), as well as screwed up table alignments... =_=;
Oh yes, sorry to all the people I was just chatting with... -_-; You see, I'm not supposed to be online anymore during the weekdays, though pc "rationing" has relaxed a lot. ^^; My mom just came home, so I had just enough time to type "gtg!" to everyone, log off and act like I was typing up some fic in Word. *sweatdrops*
Ah! I want to see Sweet November!! *____* I've always adored Keanu Reeves, he is too damn handsome for his own good. :9 I loved him best in Speed (with Sandra Bullock of all people--that screaming whiny wench! *slapslap*) and he was absolutely fantastic in The was such a good show that...and I heard the movie was inspired by anime as well...!! *lmao!*
Mid-year exams start next Friday...why am I not even turning a page? I'm serious, I haven't even touched a single book, save for maths, which I am currently drowning in... *shudders* My tuition teacher has insisted on having three sessions a week, each two days apart, and she gives unbelievable amounts of homework too! T_T
I didn't manage to complete today's homework cos I read manga till one, deluded myself that I'd wake up at four to complete it and predictably, the alarm clock forgot to ring. >_<; (Or rather, chirp. Yep, my clock chirps and plays "Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head" really wonder I'm sick to my stomach of the song.)
Quoted from TayTay, yay for randomness. *niko* Yeeaaah, I guess I'll go get a headstart on the homework...maybe. *shrugs and glances toward pile of unread rented manga*

Sunday, April 22, 2001 09:10 p.m.
Hehe, today I went to see "Slava's Snowshow." It's a play of sorts, featuring a a couple of melancholic clowns and some very magnificent effects, combining lighting and very creative use of simple props. It was beautiful! It hadn't much plot or storyline to speak of, it basically was a series of fantastical illusionary scenes happening consecutively.
There was a young boy (?) a couple rows from me though, who kept clapping throughout the silent scenes. >____< People kept shushing him, but he wouldn't stop clapping. Ugh. His mother tried too, but didn't succeed. And suddenly babies started bawling and a couple more obnoxious kids started joining the boy. *rolls eyes* They spoilt the beauty of many scenes for me, thanks guys, and mothers too afraid to take their children's behaviour in hand.
GALS! is turning out to be really good! I'd seen it often at the store, but never bothered to rent it cos the cover art looked obnoxiously bright and--well, baad. ^^; But the b+w art inside is great, and clothes the girls wear are so cool!! I waaaaant~~! *___* And why did the "Number 1" guy end up with Aya??! *twitch* I wanted him to go with Ran! *twitch* Sorry, to all non-GALS! fans who can't for their life understand me. o_O;
Ah well, off for more tomato juice. It's juice instead of water for me yeah. Juice rrrrrawks! *holds up pom-poms* Oh and Shi-chan! Greeeaaat layout... *schlurp* And yeah, Hanakimi 9 is out now. *_* My local manga store owener is really good about phoning me just as my manga arrives, and I'm really good about going to pick them up early so... *lmao*

Saturday, April 21, 2001 02:58 p.m.
Nehehehe--! Just got back from the local manga store!! *clutches treasures greedily* I haven't bought manga in such a gawdawfully long time... I only bought one though, that's Hanakimi 9, and rented GALS! first 2 volumes, plus KKJ 7. *_* I am a happy little otaku here... *tail wags*
My, I've been blogging a lot today... XP;

Saturday, April 21, 2001 12:38 p.m.
Kitsune-neesan, I just read your beautiful entry about Spielberg's "Schindler's List." I myself haven't watched the movie, though I have heard of it, and I don't exactly know all that much about the Holocaust, to say the truth.
I have read "The Diary of Anna Frank" though, and it really is a great book. To have such precious insight into a life so different from ours, a person that is so torn down by others by simply being. No, I don't know much otherwise of the history of the Holocaust, but I daresay I can understand what you're trying to say about it, as well as the decreasing awareness of our own roots in countries that are fast being changed by westernization.
Yeah, it's very much true that a lot of Singaporean youths (me included ^^;) have little idea, or simply don't care for knowledge of their ancestry, partly because of well--modernisation, change and mostly due to, like you said, westernization.
What's even worse is that we give little heed to our ignorance of our own history, brushing it aside as unimportant and irrelevant to our present lives. =/ We don't see it as all that big a problem, and, sad to say, I don't think I've even noticed it before reading your entry.
Well, the government has implemented all kinds of National education promoting things, but they centre more upon past events (such as the Japanese occupation) rather then our ancestry. Singapore really is just a big mix of people from several Asian countries, and so I guess that's why they're emphasizing more on Racial Harmony, etc. than on trying to make us more knowledgable of our several different roots.
I myself really am ignorant of where my ancestors came from, except for the fact that they came from China. ^^;;; My great-grandparents were from there, though from which part I am still unsure of. What a pitiful attempt at explanation. =_=;
Ahhh, this entry fills me with shame...! ^^ (Oh and btw, thanks ever so much for the information on the background of Wuthering Heights and its purpose. Some of it did occur to me, but your explanation has made things much clearer. =3;)

Saturday, April 21, 2001 11:53 a.m.
Yay! Onnatachi has a new Access-time layout!! Thanks to Alexa for the image! Yeaaah, I haven't used KKJ art in a loooong time--in fact, I think I've only used it once, for one of Shizukesa's older layouts. ^^v I wonder really is gorgeous art. And it doesn't look weird when flipped horizontally, like almost all other anime/manga art. I guess that means it's more...proportionate? o_O;
Pei Yi! You have AIM now?? *adds you to list* Did you go through hell to find a screen name which wasn't taken? ^^; Cos I know I did, when I registered for my account. (I even tried"*bleep*" and it was taken, but I guess a lot of people know that story ^^;;;) Dunno, maybe I'm just a really uncreative person with names.
Toshiko, that's a really great layout you have there! I wish I could work with non-anime/manga images...but sadly, I am rather "design-crippled" without them. ;_; And the moving gif at the bottom (it is an animated gif right? ^^;) is a really nice touch! =D
Oh my, my local comic store owner just phoned to inform me that my Hanakimi volume 9 is in! *_____* Getting my Hanakimi today... *hums happily*
Hrmph...haven't had much to do online besides checking mail and blog-hopping since Okashina was temporarily closed. T_T How I love that online manga... *_* Oh, and Flipper-san! *whistles* I dropped by SuzakuNU today and was amazed at how much you've gotten done! Your new sites and layouts... *_* You have so many pages for so many different series!
I am always amazed by collectives which manage to have a good mix of content and wonderful imagery. =D; To me, that takes real dedication and hard work. ^^; The side I take in the everlasting debate of substantial content as opposed to simply gorgeous layouts with little content, is of course, like many others, the former.

Friday, April 20, 2001 06:02 p.m.
Hehe, Arial 11px. I like. =D;
Enjoy the coming weekend everyone! (Take care! The weather has been screwy...o_O;)

Friday, April 20, 2001 04:17 p.m.
Thanks to the kind souls who commented on the layout! =D; It's muchly appreciated.
Suddenly I have an urge to start learning how to make winamp skins... o_O; When I look at my downloaded skin folders, it doesn't look as bad as I expected though surely it's still a lot of work. ^^; I just want to give it a go. Can anyone recommend a good tutorial or site out there?
Hmm...I've been pondering over "Wuthering Heights" for a couple of days now...I read it over a week ago, but I still can't seem to get it off my head. It's such a strange novel, so filled with love and hate coupled together it is. It really possesses a distinct difference from other old English novels I've read.
Usually an author writes a novel to get a point across, a message or certain thoughts to the reader through prose. But no matter how I look, I can't find a "message" anywhere. It's as if the novel was written simply to capture humanity and love's ugliest and most beautiful sides.
It's a wonderful book it is. I just can't seem to figure it out and be satisfied the usual way I am with other books. Yet this dissatisfaction really is amazing... o_O;;;
And the font on this layout is huge! O_<; It's Tahoma size 2, and size 1 is tiny. I can't stand Verdana any longer...ugh. And Arial is too--well, straight-ish. >_< Ahhh, I'll figure something out.

Thursday, April 19, 2001 05:44 p.m.
WAH!!! New layout! *_* This is some girl from Kamikaze, a manga image again. Kamikaze art really holds a strange appeal for me, I don't know what it is, even though I hardly know the plot or storyline of the manga itself. Ah well.
It's Onnatachi next, no worries. ^.~; I'll blog later, I suppose. I'm too tired to do much right now. X.x;

? otaku blogs #

A Digitized Existence // Diana
Absolute Zero // Gaile
Acid Spit // Reins
Amnesia Support R Us // The Old Fogey
Angry Babble // Kris
Aquavy // Allie
Bishounen Diaries // Bishies!
Cat's Delicacy // TayTay
Convent Girl // Shi-chan
Copacetic // Emi-chan
Day Lily // Jessica
Elusive Heaven // Rose
Fitter Happier // June
Frenetic // V-chan
Honky Tonk Woman // Suz
Liquification // Flipper
Long Way Home // Joey, Royce, Zac!
On The Edge // Pei Yi
Onnatachi // Me and Anna!
Oxygen // Toshi
Random Pie // Taryn
Raspberry Swirl // Joey
Standard Deviation // Selene
Sweet Dreams // Kitsune-neesan
Sweet Intoxication // Selenity
The Clearly Blurry // Ruby
The Pillow Book // Tin
The Schizo // Patrick
Truly, Madly, Viking // Miri
Unfinished Symphony // Isabela
Vanity and Suspicion // Alexa
Viva Hate // Ragabash
ZooStation // Sakura


AIM: Red Hot Hokuto
ICQ: 88912542
Site: Shizukesa


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